The other night at dinner, I asked everyone around the table to think of something to toast from the summer, and when it came to my turn, I simply said, "I'd like to toast Maria."
Let me tell you about this amazing woman I met at Taizé.
We were placed in small groups on our first day for those who wanted to participate in those after one of the brothers gave the teaching on that first morning. For the first couple of days, I was with a wonderful group of folks from Germany and then for the rest of the week, I was in a group with a mix of beautiful people from the Netherlands, Germany, Austria, Finland, Portugal, Slovenia, Kenya, and Spain. In the afternoons, our groups would meet for an hour and a half or so, and we would discuss what resonated with us from the morning teaching. Then we would share what resonated with us about what one another's reflections.
After Brother Pierre had shared about the story of Jacob on one of the mornings, I had reflected on Jacob's perseverance in his struggles and how much I appreciated that he was willing to "go to the mat" to wrestle with God. The fact that God engaged and did not give up on Jacob after all that Jacob had done in his life pointed to so much grace. I shared how this was encouraging to me in many ways, specifically when there have been disappointments or unanswered prayers through different seasons. I also shared that this story reminded me of the ways that God can help shape our hearts and cultivate trust through the circumstances of our lives.
After I shared, Maria, one of the people in our group from Spain, turned to me and said that she wanted to follow up with me about something that I said, so I found her the next day and we had some time to talk.
She said that she felt this nudge to talk to me about something that had been very pivotal in her life and that had changed her perspective in a powerful way, and I told her I was so honored that she would take the time to share with me.
She got out a piece of paper, and she started writing down words and asking me to tell her if they were good or bad.
Mountain was one of the first words, and the first thought I had was "good" as I love being in the mountains, but I know that mountains can also be quite a difficult place too. So, I said in a hesitant tone, "Both?"
She kept writing down words and I would try to attribute "good" or "bad" to them. Many of them seemed to hold possibilities of either label depending on the circumstances.
I had an idea of where she was going with this exercise because I am familiar with the Buddhist parable of the farmer:
A farmer and his son had a beloved horse who helped the family earn a living. One day, the horse ran away and their neighbors exclaimed, “Your horse ran away, what terrible luck!” The farmer replied, “Maybe so, maybe not.”
A few days later, the horse returned home, leading a few wild horses back to the farm as well. The neighbors shouted out, “Your horse has returned, and brought several horses home with him. What great luck!” The farmer replied, “Maybe so, maybe not.”
Later that week, the farmer’s son was trying to break one of the horses and she threw him to the ground, breaking his leg. The neighbors cried, “Your son broke his leg, what terrible luck!” The farmer replied, “Maybe so, maybe not.”
A few weeks later, soldiers from the national army marched through town, recruiting all boys for the army. They did not take the farmer’s son, because he had a broken leg. The neighbors shouted, “Your boy is spared, what tremendous luck!” To which the farmer replied, “Maybe so, maybe not. We’ll see.
One of the words Maria wrote down was "tsunami," and this one was more difficult for me. With so much devastation that I know about with tsunamis, I admitted to her that I thought this one might be the one I could label as bad.
I was curious that she chose this word, as I did not know much of her story since we had only been in a group for a few days. I had heard her say a passing comment a couple of days before, "I should be dead, but here we are, another summer in Taize!"
I asked her if she would be willing to share a bit more of her story as I had imagined that perhaps she had gone through cancer treatment recently when I heard that comment.
My mind was about to be blown. She told me that she survived the 2004 Indian Ocean earthquake and tsunami when she was on vacation in Thailand with her husband and three sons at the time. She almost died and had to have over eighteen surgeries after all of her injuries from the tsunami.
She said that as she was recovering that someone told her that all of the things in life (like all of the words she had written down for me) were not good or bad. They were neutral. Having this perspective changed everything for her. While we instinctively frame things in binary ways to make sense of our circumstances and our world, that does not serve us well. But if we can hold things loosely and trust in God's love through it all, it will change the grip things can have on us.
She told me that a movie was made about this experience for her and her family that came out in 2012 called The Impossible starring Naomi Watts, Ewan McGregor, and Tom Holland. I had not seen it yet, but I told her it would be one of the first things we would do when we got home. Maria said that her story was my story too in that we all have tsunamis in our lives that we have to face. And then she laughed and said that Naomi Watts had just sent her a message on WhatsApp while we were talking.
I then told her that I was so humbled and grateful that she would take the time to share her amazing story with me, and I told her that I felt that this story was for Anna as well with a lot she has gone through in the last few months. I did not share any details beyond this but simply that I knew it would mean a lot to her.
Later that day, Anna, Jason, and I went to the midday service at Taizé with about 1500 other people who were there that week as guests. As we walked out of the service, we happened to walk out about the same time that Maria and her brother Pablo were walking out. She saw Anna walking with me and asked me if this was my daughter. I confirmed, and then she turned to Anna and said, "Would it be okay if I give you a hug?" She hugged Anna tight and then looked her in the eyes and said, "You will make it."
Anna told me that it felt like time stood still and that it was so profound to have this woman show such love and speak so directly to her even though she had never met her.
We came home and watched the movie, and I was floored in seeing how they portrayed her impossible story of survival and of the miracle of her being reunited with her family after the tsunami. The 2004 tsunami "devastated communities along the surrounding coasts of the Indian Ocean, killing an estimated 227,898 people in 14 countries in one of the deadliest natural disasters in recorded history."
Below are some quotes that I found online from interviews with Maria:
One of the most powerful moments from the interview was when Belon talked about what she called the gifts the tsunami gave her. A natural disaster like this seems to take away much more than it could ever possibly give, but you have to admire her for finding any upside in the midst of such immense tragedy.
MB: This is one of the gifts the wave gave me: I don’t care about myself anymore. I only appreciate the moment. I don’t think about the past anymore, I don’t take photos of any memories, and I don’t plan anything for the future. I only have now.
https://theultimaterabbit.com/2019/05/25/tsunami-survivor-maria-belon-reflects-on-the-impossible/
In October 2020, María Belón appeared in a motivational video for BCC Speakers (via BCC Speakers on YouTube), in which she described her tsunami experience as a "gift" because it strengthened her spirit. She spoke to fellow survivors and explained that The Impossible is not her story but "the history of all of us."
https://screenrant.com/impossible-movie-true-story-belon-family-what-happened/
She has said of her experience,
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mar%C3%ADa_Bel%C3%B3n
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