“What’s that little candle for?” Willie asked......
Jamie rubbed a hand through his hair. “Aye, well. It’s … maybe a way of praying—and remembering. Ye light the candle, and say a prayer and think of people ye care for. And while it burns, the flame remembers them for ye.”
Excerpt From: Gabaldon, Diana. Voyager
with our beloved silver candlesticks from Uncle Dan from our wedding....
always a reminder of grace that abounds....
Today (January 6th) marks
one year since Jason lost his job. This has been a long road for sure and has
required perseverance, hope and faith to push us up the hills. As I look back
on this year, I am so grateful for the ways that the children have grown
through this. Anna was the one who prayed last year on the day we found out:
"Dear God, please help Daddy find a job. We know this is in Your
hands." Those words have brought me perspective and have kept me going on
many a day. Taylor commented this summer about how we've all learned to
wait in this time after he had been waiting for weeks for some lacrosse
equipment to arrive in the mail which was really really hard for him. He linked
it to how I had to wait on my visa for my trip to India until the last
minute and Jason has had to wait for a job. Taylor also told me that he
had been praying for him every night for a while when I reminded them about
Jason's job interview that he had for Seattle University in December.
These are all beautiful windows into the
work the Spirit is doing in Anna and Taylor through all of this.
Last night, as we lit
candles for Epiphany and noted that it had been a year of walking on this road
of the job search, we held hands around the table and prayed together for
Jason.
Taylor said "Please
help Daddy find a job."
Anna said "Please
help Daddy find something that he does not dread going to everyday."
And I closed with "We
thank You for how You've provided. We know this is in Your hands."
I loved what Anna said
because in some ways it reminded me of the verse in Genesis about the curse
being given to man of sweat, labor, work and toil. And this for men often
defines life and falsely can be a place where men (and women too of
course) look to find identity.
So in this year, when
Jason has demonstrated true grit and has had to press on, network, and
work like crazy to find the next step, I am seeing how God redeems. Work
does not define us, and our identity is grounded in the fact that we are indeed
His beloved children who are trying to keep holding this situation up to the
light each day. God has provided for our family through some contract work
along the way that Jason has had through Seattle Public Schools and a
few other avenues too and through more work for me at
Seattle Pacific University for which we are so grateful. There may be
some possible doors opening up soon, but in the meantime, we
are knocking, seeking, and waiting.
God has been
cultivating trust in our family, and while we don't have the answer all
neatly packaged in a box with a ribbon on top, we are continuing to hold
onto hope.
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