When Jason and I went to our marriage retreat last fall as well, we were asked to give each other a gift at the end of the retreat. It was not supposed to be an expensive gift- but just something small (something that we found or something under $5 if we did spend money) that would represent some truth that we wanted to remember from our weekend together. We tried to find some stones to stack like the cairns that we had made on Whidbey Island on the beach, but it was hard to find a few smooth stones in downtown Seattle where we were on our retreat. The idea of the gift was given and we eventually collected some rocks last month that we would stack as a reminder.
I stacked them on our dresser at first and it actually took some patience and balance to get the stones to stack and to not fall down. The problem was that every time we closed the drawers, they would come crashing down, and it seemed a bit too high maintenance to keep them there.
I've moved them downstairs to the kitchen and have found a spot for them for the time being on the kitchen table. I still have to stack them when they fall but they don't crash down every time I close a drawer where they are now so that's a good move.
The simple practice of stacking them on a regular basis reminds me that marriage does take this constant rebuilding with patience and care and intention. It reminds me of this old Nike advertisement from the early 90's:
So this is love, as demanding and nourishing and difficult as it can be, and as strong and wise as it makes you become. There is something to be gained from commitment. There are rewards for staying when you would rather leave. And there is something to be said for running up that hill when you would rather slide down it. And so you let love come perch upon your shoulder. And you do not turn it away. You do the tango. Just do it.
No comments:
Post a Comment